"Commencement is not an end, but a beginning"
This statement could not be any more truthful. Upon my commencement from the University of Texas, it was clear that I had left one stage of my life and was looking ahead to another. The opportunity of a new career, the proposal of a life long partnership, the independence of my first apartment on my own all came up within a week of my graduating. My life has truely changed, and I am better for it. This journal hopes to share with those who care my journey into my new life. I hope to share the ups and downs as a maneuver my way through the challenges that lie ahead (i'm counting on more ups than downs, but we'll see).
At this point, I think I'll take a moment to bring myself up to date with my life.
Divorce is eminent. This is not a good thing at all, but it is something that i need to do. I lived a lie for many years and now it is time for me to break free. I feel sorry for my daughter, who is recieving most of the blows from her father that should be directed at me. Its a very sad situation. We have been separated for 7 months now. While the transition has been a difficult one for those involved, we all know (or should know) that the situation is definate. There are certain events that need to occur before the divorce takes place, primarily the acquisition of $1500 to retain a lawyer. My goal is to have this money raised by the end of the summer, if not sooner. That is my goal, and I have put it in writing, where people can see it, so I guess that makes it official. I have closed the book on that part of my life, now I just need to convince the great state of Texas that its over.
To continue with the dumpy stuff going on in my life, my best friend is in jail, the reasons for which are to great to go into detail here. Things do not look so good for her, and the chances of her getting out anytime soon seem to be dwindling. I have extremely mixed emotions about the whole situation. A part of me hates to see her in there, and would like her to be out, availible to me as a best friend. Another part of me thinks that jail is the only thing that will knock any sense into her. The fact that I've taken on her apartment, and have grown accustomed to living alone complicates the matter even more.
One last grumpy thing before I move on. I am missing my daughter, Sheryl, terribly. She is visiting her grandparents in south Texas for the next two weeks. I never realized how close the two of us are. I miss her hugs, and her kisses, and her smart allec remarks. She brings a lot of joy to my life, something that seems to be missing already and she's only been gone for 4 days. You can bet she'll get lots of hugs and kisses upon her return.
On the career end, I'm waiting to hear back about the job I interviewed for a couple of weeks ago. I'm a bit tense about it. I know that i've made the short list, and that the final decision will be made at some point this week. The wait is killing me emotionally.
Finally, saving the best for last, I am in love. I honestly believe I have found my sole mate, Chris. This came as a grand surprise considering the fact that I'm not even divorced yet. Somehow none of that seems to matter. I truely enjoy spending time with this man, and his hugs aren't that bad either. I've learned a lot from him in the last six months, about love and about myself. For that I am truely greatful. For the first time in my life, I am in a relationship that does not involve psychological games or ego trips. I can honestly say that I am happy. I love this man! To add to the excitement of this romance, we have begun to plan our future together. That is a future I am looking forward to.
On that note, I apologize for the length of this entry and promise to make them shorter in the future.
Chem
This statement could not be any more truthful. Upon my commencement from the University of Texas, it was clear that I had left one stage of my life and was looking ahead to another. The opportunity of a new career, the proposal of a life long partnership, the independence of my first apartment on my own all came up within a week of my graduating. My life has truely changed, and I am better for it. This journal hopes to share with those who care my journey into my new life. I hope to share the ups and downs as a maneuver my way through the challenges that lie ahead (i'm counting on more ups than downs, but we'll see).
At this point, I think I'll take a moment to bring myself up to date with my life.
Divorce is eminent. This is not a good thing at all, but it is something that i need to do. I lived a lie for many years and now it is time for me to break free. I feel sorry for my daughter, who is recieving most of the blows from her father that should be directed at me. Its a very sad situation. We have been separated for 7 months now. While the transition has been a difficult one for those involved, we all know (or should know) that the situation is definate. There are certain events that need to occur before the divorce takes place, primarily the acquisition of $1500 to retain a lawyer. My goal is to have this money raised by the end of the summer, if not sooner. That is my goal, and I have put it in writing, where people can see it, so I guess that makes it official. I have closed the book on that part of my life, now I just need to convince the great state of Texas that its over.
To continue with the dumpy stuff going on in my life, my best friend is in jail, the reasons for which are to great to go into detail here. Things do not look so good for her, and the chances of her getting out anytime soon seem to be dwindling. I have extremely mixed emotions about the whole situation. A part of me hates to see her in there, and would like her to be out, availible to me as a best friend. Another part of me thinks that jail is the only thing that will knock any sense into her. The fact that I've taken on her apartment, and have grown accustomed to living alone complicates the matter even more.
One last grumpy thing before I move on. I am missing my daughter, Sheryl, terribly. She is visiting her grandparents in south Texas for the next two weeks. I never realized how close the two of us are. I miss her hugs, and her kisses, and her smart allec remarks. She brings a lot of joy to my life, something that seems to be missing already and she's only been gone for 4 days. You can bet she'll get lots of hugs and kisses upon her return.
On the career end, I'm waiting to hear back about the job I interviewed for a couple of weeks ago. I'm a bit tense about it. I know that i've made the short list, and that the final decision will be made at some point this week. The wait is killing me emotionally.
Finally, saving the best for last, I am in love. I honestly believe I have found my sole mate, Chris. This came as a grand surprise considering the fact that I'm not even divorced yet. Somehow none of that seems to matter. I truely enjoy spending time with this man, and his hugs aren't that bad either. I've learned a lot from him in the last six months, about love and about myself. For that I am truely greatful. For the first time in my life, I am in a relationship that does not involve psychological games or ego trips. I can honestly say that I am happy. I love this man! To add to the excitement of this romance, we have begun to plan our future together. That is a future I am looking forward to.
On that note, I apologize for the length of this entry and promise to make them shorter in the future.
Chem
posted by Rebecca at 1:38 PM
0 comments
